To the Future and Back Again?
by crazibookwormi
Summary: Alexa and Keila, twins who are just as obsessed with Jack and pirates as we fanfic writers are, discovers a magical pen that can do the unbelievable.  Through the pen, Jack arrives in modernday LA.  His quest: to return to his beloved Caribbean. Plz R&R!
1. Discovery

**A/N: Hi, everybody! I'm writing this with blackpearl.fantasy, so it should be rather good...if not very. I mean, she's SO good at writing, but then so am I...XP (Actually to tell you the truth, I am SO much better.) Anyway, the point is (I'm finally getting there), PLEASE read this and REVIEW!!!!!! This is our first shot at humor, so the characters will seem a bit OOC, but trust me, it'll get better. Again, READ AND REVIEW!!! Thanks.**

**Disclaimer: If POTC belonged to us (which it only does in our _dreams..._), we would be plastered all over the newspapers. Which we're not. Or maybe we are...**

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Captain Jack Sparrow was sitting in his boat. He took off his boots and ate them.

No just kidding.

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Here's how the story REALLY began: 

Alexa and Keila walked around the school campus, hot and tired. Every once in a while, they bent down and picked up a piece of trash, tossing it into the nearest trashbin.

"I'm bored," complained Alexa.

"I know, but it's totally _your _fault for making us do this stupid trash clean-up. Whatever. At least we're cleaning up the school," Keila answered impatiently.

"It's not fair!" said Alexa. "I _cannot_ believe we got detention because we were writing fanfiction in class!! I was just on the part when Jack took off his shirt..."

"Uh...EW!" Keila rolled her eyes, bending down and picking up a bent straw. "I don't see why you have to _include_ that kind of stuff in fanfiction, for gosh sakes."

"Yeah it was for Elizabeth and my pen ran out of ink at that moment anyway," said Alexa grumpily. "I need a new one. But I liked that one! It was my favorite pen! My _favorite_ pen!" She jumped up and down, fuming.

Keila sighed in exasperation.

"Oh, look," she muttered. "Just take this." She picked up a dirty, bent pen from the ground and handed it to Alexa, who looked at it in disgust.

"I doubt that'll work..." But she wiped away the dirt and drew on her hand. There was plenty of blue ink in it, and it left a dark mark on her palm. She shrugged and pocketed it.

"At least we found _something _of use from this picking-up-trash thing. Let's just get the job done and go home. I have tons of Geo homework left to do and if we keep dragging on like this I'm going to have to stay up until 3 in the morning. Plus you know how bad I am at it." Keila grumbled.

"No you're not! You're smarter than me, at least!"

"Yeah, well you're not very smart."

"ExCUSE me?" Alexa began chasing Keila around the blacktop, both girls screaming at the top of their lungs.

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The girls had argued all the way home and now they were sitting in Alexa's bedroom doing homework. Alexa pushed her history assignment aside and pulled out a fresh sheet of paper. She fished the pen out of her pocket and scribbled boredly. 

_Keila's hair turned blue._

She smiled to herself a bit, crumpled up the paper, and tossed it into her trash can. A moment later she heard Keila quietly slip out to go to the bathroom, and because she really was bored out of her wits, she retrieved the paper and wrote some more.

_It was a lovely shade of turquoise, the color that she hated most. It happened very quickly and she was shocked. _

Someone screamed.

"Erm... Keila?"

"Alexa, what happened?!" Keila tore out of the bathroom swearing incomprehensibly with her fingers pulling at her hair. "_What_ happened?!"

Alexa's jaw dropped a few inches. Keila's hair was a lovely shade of turquoise, and just a few minutes ago she remembered seeing it in all its golden-brown glory.

"I--I--But--" Alexa stammered. She picked up the sheet of crumpled paper, then examined the pen. It looked pretty ordinary... Keila yanked the paper away and stared at it, then at the pen, and slowly and furiously shifted her gaze to Alexa.

Alexa's face now turned a lovely shade of red.

"I... I didn't know...I was just bored...Hold on! Let me see if I can fix it." She grabbed the paper from Keila's hands and wrote:

_Then, as quickly as it had turned blue, it returned to its original shade of golden-brown._

She looked up at Keila's hair. It was golden-brown.

"Oh. My. God," she whispered.

"What? I can't believe you would do that!"

"No, not that!" said Alexa. "Think of what we can do with this pen!"

Keila's eyes widened in realization. She jerked the pen from Alexa's shaking hands and wrote:

_Alexa's ugly t-shirt and jeans suddenly disappeared._

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Alexa started spitting out a stream of profanities, grabbed the blanket from her bed, and tried unsuccessfully to wrap herself in it.

Keila burst out laughing.

"KEILA!!!!" Alexa shrieked. "Ugh, give me the pen!"

Keila took a deep breath.

"Wait, I need a moment." She slipped the pen in her pocket, climbed onto Alexa's bed and jumped up and down, clapping her hands, screaming gleefully in a high-pitched voice for a full five minutes before coming back down and fixing Alexa's er... problem.

After the _problem_ was fixed, Alexa and Keila sat down and began imagining things. Random, wild, things.

Suddenly, Keila came up with an idea. She picked up the pen and began scribbling furiously on a completely blank piece of paper.

_As Captain Jack Sparrow drifted along in his dinghy, he landed on what seemed to be a deserted island. Stretching his arms above his head, he walked around it, having not found anything interesting but a pool of clear water. It looked clean enough, so he drank some of it. Then...he disappeared._

_And reappeared in Alexa's bedroom._

That was exactly what happened.

"OH. MY. GOD." Keila stared.

Alexa stood up, turned around, and fainted at the sight of the world's favorite pirate standing in. Her. Room.

"This is so fantastic!" shrieked Keila, and she ran to Jack and hugged him with insane joy.

Jack was alarmed. He pushed Keila away and shouted a long stream of profanities at her.

"Oh. Sorry." Keila backed off, tripped over Alexa, and fell to the floor with a thud.

Jack looked from poster-covered-wall to another of the same sort. They were all posters of himself, and he looked rather pleased with that. There was one of him, the whelp, and Lizzie and the words _Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest. _And a smaller picture of... he looked closer and looked away quickly.

It was one of Elizabeth kissing him.

Then his mind began to register the situation. More clearly than before that is.

"Where the hell am I? Where's the pool? Of water? More specifically (or generally), where did the ocean go?!" He paused and looked at Alexa and Keila, with raised eyebrows. "And...who are you?"

Keila stood up and shook Alexa awake before saying quickly, "You're in our house. This is Alexa's room. Mine is down the hall, if you want to visit me there." She batted her eyelashes.

Jack backed away even further.

"Erm...could you possibly tell me where I am? Oh, and what kind of a name is Alexa?"

"I like it!" protested Alexa. "You're in... Los Angeles! You know... LA? In California! In America. That light any lightbulbs?"

"Uh no, actually. But uh...I'm looking for an ocean and a...deserted island with a sandy beach and well, there does not appear to be a deserted island in here." Jack frowned. "Or is it just me?"

"What are you talking about?" Alexa asked in a confused manner.

Jack ignored her, sighing dramatically. "Looks like we're not in the Caribbean anymore."

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**blackpearl.fantasy says: Erm, yeah okay now that I've been sufficiently embarrassed in the A/N, please review. :)**


	2. Hostage

**A/N: Okay, here's Chapter 2! First of all, I want to say "thank you" to all of my fantastic readers and reviewers! It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside...:) I don't know if this chapter's any good or not, so we'll just have to see. It might be a bit short, so I'll just call it a "transition" chapter. Again, please read and REVIEW!!! By the way, if you didn't know already, blackpearl.fantasy wrote the first section of this chapter. I'm not going to take _all_ the credit for myself. :)**

**Disclaimer: Why is this even here? Of _course _PotC belongs to me!!!! Duh! (If you believed this, you seriously need to work on your common sense.)**

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Keila went to the bathroom and brought back a cup of water. She poured it over Alexa's face, successfully doing three things: making Alexa wake up and scream, earning an odd look from Jack, and soaking Alexa's green throw rug.

Alexa took one look at Jack and her face melted into a dreamy smile.

"Snap out of it," Keila advised.

"Oi," said Jack.

"Oh, yeah, um, Jack." Alexa stumbled over her words. "Er, have a seat."

Jack sat cautiously on the bed and stared at her pointedly.

"Well, we just found—" began Keila.

"you in my bedroom all of a sudden," said Alexa. "We have no idea what happened. But—" she gave fangirl-y scream, "—it's the best thing that's ever happened in my life!!" she gushed. "I mean…" she stopped, grinning widely, to take a deep breath and continued, "_Jack Sparrow_—oh, sorry, Captain—in _my room!_"

Jack blinked.

"… honestly, I _knew_ you were real," Alexa was still saying, "But this has only ever happened in a dream! Oh god, _Captain Jack Sparrow_, sitting right here, on _my bed_! Right in front of me! Right within my reach!"

She continued her little speech in the same manner, stopping every now and then to let out a little scream and put her hand to her heart and try to steady her breathing.

Jack watched her, face blank.

He turned to Keila, who was staring at Alexa in a strange way.

"I'll get her to calm down…" she said, and deciding not spoil whatever crazy plan Alexa had in mind (as usual), she walked to her sister and pretended to try to "calm her" with her back to Jack, so that she could write on her hand, _Alexa calmed down._

Alexa calmed down.

She took a breath, sat down at her desk chair, and stared at Jack with a fascinated expression. Jack glanced her, and looked away at Keila.

"Methinks I am alarmed," he said.

"Don't worry, she's just always wanted to see you in person," said Keila.

Jack blinked again.

"She's not some… daughter to a cousin of the brother of an aunt of Beckett who's life's ambition is to hang me if Beckett died, which he did, is she?"

Keila's eyes widened in shock. Jack thought they were related to Beckett! The horror, the horror!

"No, no, no! Oh, Jack—can I call you Jack? Thanks—how could you think that?! Lex is my twin, if she's related to stupid Beckett, than I am too! And how could you _think _that? We're your _hugest_ fans _ever_, we would never have anything to do with Beckett! _That's_ why we're so excited to see you in here! It's absolutely _amazing_—_unbelievable_! We are _so_ happy! It's so _incredible _to meet you, you're the most _fabulous_ pirate ever—oh my god we couldn't even imagine something happening to us like this—" She screamed just like Alexa "—and honestly it _is_ the best thing that's happened to us… _Captain Jack Sparrow_! And you're even more awesome in person—" she danced around, looking as if she had had an overload of sugar, holding her hands over her mouth to stifle the most stunningly long ear-piercing _eeeeeee! _in the history of stunningly long ear-piercing _eeeeeee!_s.

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"Jack! Come down here!" Alexa shouted up the stairs.

"Yeah, Jack!" Keila chimed in. Then turning to Alexa, she whispered excitedly, "Oh my god I'm so _excited_! I can't believe this is actually happening!" Alexa grinned back at her and turned her attention back to the stairs.

As if on cue, Jack Sparrow strode down the stairs, with a bit of a sour look plastered on his face.

When he reached the twins, he asked dully, "Where are we going?"

"Oh, I don't know. Wait, no, on the other hand, I _do_ know! We can go to the park first!" Alexa wrapped an arm around Jack's and tugged on his sleeve.

Jack squirmed out of her grasp, rather uncomfortably.

"Oh my gosh Alex. You are so bo_ring_. I have an idea. Why don't we go to the movies first?" Keila suggested.

"Oh good idea." Jack answered, then paused. "Wait...what's a movie?"

Alex rolled her eyes and tugged on his sleeve again. "Don't you worry. You'll find out once you get there. And you'll be in it!"

"I'm in a movie?" Jack perked up. "Hold on...is that a good thing?"

"Yes of course! Most people would die if they got a role in a movie, particularly one as famous as yours." Keila exchanged glances with Alexa.

"I have a movie?" Jack asked.

"You're _in_ one. Can we go now?" Alexa asked impatiently.

Jack wouldn't budge. "Ohh...is a movie like a box? Something that I can go into?" He paused, thinking. "But why would people die if they went into a box?"

"It's not a BOX!" Alexa and Keila nearly-shouted together.

Jack frowned. "Then if it's not a box, then what else can you go into?" He thought for a moment. "Ohhh, I know...a...house?"

"Ughhhh." Keila and Alexa each took an arm and attempted to drag him out the front door. But he didn't budge.

"A...tavern? Ohhhhh, I get it. A ship!" He stopped, and started to whine like a five-year-old. "But I want my _Black Pearl_!!!! I don't want some stupid _movie_."

Alexa put her hands on her hips. "Well, you're not going to get it."

Keila slapped her arm. "Don't be so mean!"

"Well, even if we brought it here, where would we put it? What would we do with it?"

"Good question..."

Jack looked at the two sisters, then suggested, "Well, then don't bring my _Pearl_; bring Lizzie."

"What?!" Both stared at Jack.

"Look, Jack, we've already told you. If you want to go back, you have to do things with us. We've already explained the pen situation with you and we're going to, let's say_, hold you hostage_ until you've fulfilled our needs. In this case, wants." Keila narrowed her eyes at him.

"Aye, but you've never said that you couldn't bring Lizzie and the others, did you?"

Alexa glanced at Keila. "Well, that's true..."

"No." Keila snapped. "This is our chance to be with Jack, and I'm not going to let Miss Swann, or should I say, _Mrs. Turner_," looking at Jack, "ruin this for us. Now, end of discussion. Let's go."

Jack was taken aback by her sharp words. Then he roughly grabbed Keila, staring into her frightened eyes.

"You can_not_ take me hostage like this."

Keila smiled a wavering (but nevertheless smug) smile. "Apparently we can."

Jack's eyes bored into her. "You know who you sound like? Barbossa." He spat.

Alexa gasped. Then, grasping Keila's wrist, she pleaded with her. "Keila, why don't we just do it? Bring Elizabeth here. You never know, it might just add to the fun."

Keila wrenched herself away from Jack (as much as she wanted to stay in his arms...) and matched his expression. She and Jack had a two-minute staredown.

Finally, Keila relented (blinking furiously).

"All right, all right. I'll bring your precious Lizzie here, if that'll make you happy." Jack's face lighted up, but sullied again when Keila held up a finger.

"But...I have a condition."

Jack waited for a few seconds before replying, "Speak your terms, Miss..."

Keila ignored him. "You have to swear that there will be no romance here, under this roof or in this community."

Jack narrowed his eyes and shook his head abruptly. "No."

Keila sneered. "Well, then this case is closed."

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**A/N: How'd you like this chapter? If you have any suggestions, please feel free to share them! Thank you for reading; we'll be updating by Friday. Remember to keep a lookout! Right now, please just review. :)**


	3. A Plan

**A/N: First of all, _thank you so much_ to all of my fabulous readers and reviewers! They are so wonderful... I tried to get this chapter up as quickly as possible, seeing as I promised you that I would get it up by Friday and I never go back on my word. :) So...read and ENJOY! Oh and don't forget to review!**

**Disclaimer: I won't spend too much time on this now...but you know the answer. PotC belongs to the ingenious creator(s), DISNEY!!!!**

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Jack stared hard at her. Keila, with a toss of her hair, strode out the front door.

Alexa looked from Keila, to Jack, then back to Keila.

"Keila!" she called, running after her sister. "Keila, wait!"

Keila turned around with her eyebrows raised.

"What? You didn't think I would wait for you?"

Alexa took her hand. "Why don't you just be nice to poor Jack and bring Elizabeth? And why no romance? Last time I checked, you _loved_ romance."

Keila shook her head and frowned. "But that's different. It's only in books. Besides, I brought Jack so that _we_ could have some fun. Not to see Jack and Elizabeth go mushy-mushy on us." She paused before continuing. "Okay, that's it. I'm leaving now. If you want to come along, you'd better hurry."

Alexa went back inside the house to retrieve Jack. Keila turned around and wrote on her hand _Jack became very excited to come to the movies with us._

The next thing she knew, Jack was next to her, his eyes bright, tail wagging with excitement (if he had a tail, that is.)

"Let's go, shall we? I can't wait to see what happens in a _movie_."

Alexa looked at him strangely, then at Keila. The twins each took one of Jack's arms and they walked, linked arm in arm, toward the direction of the movie theater.

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It was too dark to see, and the sound of clashing swords was deafening, but Keila managed to hear Jack's words. 

"Isn't that me?"

Alexa sighed in exasperation. "Yes, we've already told you, you're in this movie."

It seemed as if a lightbulb had suddenly gone on over Jack's head.

"Ohh is _this_ what you meant by a 'movie'?"

Both girls ignored him and tried to focus on the screen. Once in a while Keila checked her pocket to make sure the pen was still there, and she got very frightened once, when the person sitting next to her bumped into her with a sudden movement, and she thought she had lost the pen. But she found it still, and cuddled it next to her face lovingly, incredibly proud that she had been the one who had found it, even if Alexa had discovered its power.

Five minutes passed since the minor "accident". Suddenly, Keila jerked in her chair.

Jack was too busy preening himself in looking so outrageously handsome on the large screen to notice Keila's sudden movement. But Alexa was distracted as well and saw her.

"Are you all right?" Alexa asked in worry, leaning over Jack.

Keila turned towards her. "Meet me in the bathroom."

Then turning to Jack, she said, "I have to use the restroom for a moment. _Don't go anywhere_." Jack nodded slightly but was so caught up in the movie that she wasn't even sure if he heard her or not. But she was too excited to care.

After Keila had left, Alexa told him, "I have to use the restroom too. Please please please I'm begging you, stay in your seat and _don't go anywhere_." She rushed away.

Then, bursting into the empty bathroom she spotted Keila in the farthest stall. She knocked on it and said, "It's me."

Keila opened the door.

"Oh my god I have such a great idea right now. It'll _completely _solve the problem of Elizabeth."

"What?" Alexa asked breathlessly. Then, "Oh no..."

"Oh _yes_ you mean. Of course, why didn't I think of this before? Just erase the part of his memory with us telling him about the pen and how he got here! Duh..."

"But wouldn't that hurt him?" Alexa asked worriedly.

Keila shook her head quickly. "Of course not you dummy! It's painless. So...are you in...or out?"

There was a long moment of silence. Then, Alexa agreed reluctantly, "Fine."

Keila grinned widely, rushing through her words, "Okay so first we'll have to---no, why not---no, I want to---no, that won't---yes it wi--no---"

Alexa interrupted. "Shut up Keila! How do you even know this will work? We don't know the limits of this pen and I'm starting to think maybe it wasn't such a great idea to have found it..."

"God Alexa you are so...cautious! Trust me, this will all work out fine." Before Alexa could add another word, Keila scribbled on her hand, _We never told Jack about the pen and how he got here._ She paused before adding, _He never asked._

Alexa craned her neck to see. She read the words and slowly lifted her eyes to meet Keila's.

"This better not go wrong."

Keila smiled mischievously. "Oh trust me it _will_ work."

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By the time the two girls arrived back in the theater, the credits were rolling. Both Keila and Alexa groaned but went up to look for Jack. They pushed their way up the steps past excited viewers and _finally_ reached their seats. 

Jack wasn't there.

Keila panicked. "Oh no, what happened to him? Oh my god, I _told_ him to stay in his seat. Maybe I should have written that down. Ughhhhhh. What if he got in trouble? What if other people recognized him? I thought we altered his appearance quite well...oh no...oh no..."

Alexa placed a hand on her trembling shoulder. "Don't worry Keila, he's probably in here somewhere. He doesn't have anywhere else to go."

The two girls scanned the half-emptied room, walking around muttering to themselves, "Jack, where are you? Geez, just come out. Why didn't you listen to me?"

Suddenly they heard a noise. Someone was singing in a drunken tone. The voice drifted up from...the front of the theater. Alexa and Keila glanced at the bottom and both thought in disgust, "Oh my gosh another one of those old drunken fools. I wonder why LA has so many of them..."

But when Alexa took a closer look, she gasped.

"What is he doing _there_?!"

Keila looked at her strangely. "What?"

"Look it's Jack!" She ran down the steps to Jack. His drunken singing got louder and louder as she got closer. When she was about 10 steps away, she could make out the words.

"_I went to the ole' Locker  
but no, no, Davy Jones couldn't keep me there...  
my dear Lizzie came to save me  
she was there with that whelp, Will  
Oh why oh why does she love him?  
She should love me...  
Yo ho--ho a pirate's life for...and really bad...eggs_" Upon reaching the word "eggs" he staggered and fell to the ground flat on his face.

"Jack, what are you doing?!" Alexa cried, running over to him.

Jack had managed to lure the attention of several spectators toward him. Realizing that they were staring at him (some in amusement, some in disgust, and the other half with no idea what was going on), Jack began to sing louder (to no avail), his voice muffled in the carpet.

"Jack stop." Keila stood, towering over him. But Jack was too drunk to notice her. Keila resorted to writing, _Jack stopped singing, stood up, and apologized to us, kissing my hand_. Then she quickly scratched out that last part.

Jack (as she expected) stood up, brushing off the popcorn bits from the front of his shirt and his pants.

"Sorry, so sorry mate." He looked at me apologetically.

"Apology taken." Keila smiled and then decided to test out her plan.

"Do you know how you got here?"

Jack immediately responded. "Didn't you walk me here?"

"No I meant how you got here to LA."

Jack looked her and furrowed his eyebrows. "Didn't...you...write me here?"

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**A/N: Again, please review! Ch. 4 will be up by Tuesday! (Maybe Monday; I'm going to be busy over the weekend, my apologies.)**


	4. A Nice Cup of Hot Tea

**A/N: Many thanks to my (our) wonderful reviewers!! You guys are absolutely wonderful. Anyway, here's chapter 4!!**

**Disclaimer: PotC belongs to neither blackpearl.fantasy nor myself. But we do own Alexa and Keila...but only because they are freakishly similar to us (well, in the nicer way)...and the pen (that's a comfort :)

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Keila gasped. What was going on? Was there something wrong with the pen _already_?!

Alexa lowered her head and muttered under her breath, "Told you so."

Keila looked at Jack carefully. "Are you _sure_ about that?"

Jack looked at her strangely. "Yes, of course. Do you really think I have _that_ bad of a memory? How do you think I survive as a captain?"

Keila was shocked. She grabbed Alexa's wrist and turned to Jack. "Don't you _dare_ go anywhere again."

Then she dragged Alexa towards the bathroom. When they reached it (again), Keila whirled around to face her sister.

"Ughh!" she groaned. "What is going on?!"

Alexa crossed her arms and smirked. "I told you something would go wrong. Now what do you plan on doing?"

Keila retrieved the pen from her pocket and examined it as a doctor would examine his patient, all the while muttering, "Doesn't seem to be any different..."

Alexa pondered aloud, "Do you think there's some kind of a limit to the pen? Like the user can only use it, say...5 times?"

"Oh, please no," said Keila. "That way Jack will never get back to the eighteenth-century Caribbean."

"Nothing wrong with that," commented Alexa brightly.

"True enough," said Keila, and they both sank into a wonderful cotton-candy-sweet dreamland.

Keila was the first to come out of their reverie.

"Lex, we've gotta do something about this. Here," she said, handing the pen to Alexa. "_You_ go ahead and try to find something wrong with it."

Alexa turned it over in her hands, removed the cap and observed the ink. Then she sniffed it a little and licked it.

"Ew." Keila looked at her disgustedly.

"I got it!" said Alexa.

"What?" demanded Keila immediately.

"It's not as dirty as before."

"What?!"

"Well, if you look at it now..." protested Alexa, showing her.

"I think you _licked _it off."

"No, I didn't!" shouted Alexa frustratedly, and showed Keila her tongue.

"All right, fine," sighed Keila. "But how can you _taste_ the difference? Did you lick it _before_ too?!"

Alexa shifted uncomfortably. "Well... um..."

"You're _disgusting_...and to think that you're my sister. Maybe in the previous life you were a _dog_," Keila snickered.

"Yeah back to the point," said Alexa firmly. "So it's not as dirty... And I _didn't _lick it off..."

"What can that possibly mean?" asked Keila.

"It's another pen," said Alexa simply.

Keila gasped in sudden realization. "Omigod, I think you're _right_!"

"_Really_?!" barked Alexa sarcastically.

"Give it to me!" Keila grabbed it out of her hands and started examining it again.

After another minute passed, she yelped in excitement.

"Lex, take a look at this!"

Alexa bent to look at what Keila was pointing at.

The engraving _PenMate_ was visible, instead of the completely dirt-encrusted length of the pen they had picked up on their school campus.

"Oh, fantastic," said Alexa. "Where's the real one?"

"How would I know? I checked like... every five minutes in the theater--" suddenly she stopped and her entire face lit up with enlightenment.

"What?" said Alexa impatiently.

"Wait..." Keila frowned in concentration.

"I'm waiting..."

"Wait..."

Keila looked up.

"It's coming!" said Alexa.

"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"

"There we go." Alexa rolled her eyes and then eagerly leaned toward Keila. "Now tell."

"Okay. I kept checking for the pen, and there was this person sitting next to me, who bumped into me at one point--"

"Oh! And then--"

"--yeah, he or she--"

"--I get it--"

"--yeah we have to go--"

"--I hope Jack's still there--"

They ran out the bathroom and raced towards the theater. They found Jack standing outside with a crowd of people around him, including many men with cameras.

"Er... excuse me, I need to get to the man standing there--" said Alexa impatiently, pulling Keila by the wrist and pushing her way through the indignant crowd. She passed a little boy who was shouting, "It's Captain Jack Sparrow! It's Captain Jack Sparrow!" and a teenage girl who looked a few years older than them, her face trancelike and screaming, "_Johnny Depp! _You are _such_ a hottie! I _can't_ believe I'm actually meeting you! Can I kiss you, please please please?" The papparazzi were repeatedly taking pictures and momentarily blinding everyone else, and asking, "Johnny what are you doing in LA?"

"He lives here, stupid," said Keila irritably when they had finally fought their way to Jack, who was staring at all this publicity with a rather frightened expression.

"I want my mommy," he wailed.

Alexa stopped in her tracks, looking skeptically alarmed. "Wow, you're more of a baby than we thought."

"C'mon let's go," Keila motioned to them hurriedly. "We have to find whoever somehow took the pen."

"Come on, Jack," Alexa pulled Jack by the wrist out of the shouting crowd, screaming back, "None of this happened! It's a dream! An illusion! It's not real, _not real_, you hear me?! NOT REAL! So you go home and have a _niiiiiiiice_ hot cup of tea. Okay? Or soda if you want. On the other hand, that might not be so good for those of you out there who are diabetic. Ok then, hot water! For the little kids I suggest warm milk. But remember, don't drink too much or you'll have to go pee. And mommies out there, you don't want them to pee in their beds now do you? So--"

_"ALEXA!" _Keila shrieked.

Alexa turned around.

"Oh. Right."

And she bolted.

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**A/N**: **Now please review!!! And remember, have a nice cup of... yeah, just review. :)**

**We'll be updating on Thursday:)**

**Did I mention to review?**

**Yeah, I'll stop blabbering now.**


	5. Maniacs with a New Plan

**A/N: Our dear readers, we are so so so sorry we didn't post this yesterday! We were a bit busier than normal so we just kept lagging...so SORRY!**

**Another thing is that we won't be announcing the next chapter anymore. But don't you worry, we'll still update ASAP. :)**

**One last thing: _Many many thanks to our wonderful readers and reviewers! Candy for all of you wonderful people! _Yes it's a bit late since Halloween was two days ago but better late than never!**

**Warning: There might be some inappropiate stuff in here about certain body parts (nothing too bad) but still, read at your own risk. (It's at the end though; plus it shouldn't make too much of a difference, this story's rated T anyway. :)**

**Disclaimer: PotC belongs to Disney, but this story belongs to US! Yay! (dances around in excitement and partly due to sugar rushes)**

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Alexa and Keila dragged Jack up the hallway and turned right where the hallway forked, and into the last theater there, where a romantic drama was at its climax and nobody had seemed to notice that a certain fictional pirate captain, or his actor, had been pulled out of a crowd of fans by two mental psychotic teenaged freaks. 

"Okay," said Keila quietly. "We have to try to get back to the theater with At World's End playing so that we can ask the guy who sat next to me if he has my pen…"

Jack only understood half of this but he nodded.

They crept out and ran back to the theater playing Pirates of the Caribbean. The crowds had scattered and they went inside silently. Keila scanned the people watching the movie and went immediately to where they had been sitting. But… the seat next to Keila's was empty.

"What the hell?!" she screamed frustratedly.

At that moment, two things happened. One, the theater turned much brighter because of a scene change, and two, everyone, including Jack and Alexa, turned to look at her.

Keila made a shifty-eyes expression, smiled sweetly, and said, very quietly, in a high voice, "Oops."

Everyone except Alexa turned back to the screen as if nothing had happened, in time to watch Will and Elizabeth kissing on screen. Jack turned back to Keila, disgusted, while the movie-watchers shouted passionately, protesting that Sparrabeth was the one and only ship to ever successfully sail the Caribbean, and that the Willabeth ship had sank before it was even properly constructed.

"In other words," said Alexa loudly, beckoning for Keila to come down. "Sparrabeth rocks and Willabeth sucks. Point made!"

They ran out the theater, Jack luckily unnoticed, and Alexa cornered Keila .

"_What_ happened?" she demanded.

"That person—he's not there anymore!" said Keila hastily. "Stop looking at me like that! It burns!"

"Is he in the bathroom…?" wondered Alexa.

"No, no no no," said Keila. "Don't even _think _about it."

"I'm thinking about it, and it's worth a try," said Alexa. "We can just run in and check really quickly and come out, kay?"

"All right, fine."

They were both wearing very baggy black sweatshirts so they did not look too much like girls if they put their hoods up. They pulled Jack with them into the mens' bathroom.

"That one," whispered Keila, indicating a man washing his hands. "Could be him."

"'Scuse me," said Alexa loudly, trying to make her voice lower, "Do you have a blue pen that's really battered and everything?"

The man stared at them for a while then walked out the bathroom muttering, "Stupid kids."

A few toilets flushed and the twins walked closer to the stalls. Several people walked out at once.

"Stand still," said Keila, walking toward them and peering closely at each person's face, then dismissing them if they did not look like the person she was looking for. "Nope, not you, not you, what _is_ that thing on your face—oh no sorry I didn't mean it! Not you…"

"Keila? What are you doing in the guy's bathroom?"

Keila turned. It was someone from school. Alexa rolled her eyes and dragged Jack and an emitting-an-I'm-So-Dead-type-scream-from-her-throat Keila out.

"Look, this is so pointless!" she said. "Let's just go home."

"No!" said Keila. "We could ask the box office people who bought Pirates tickets…"

"How would anyone be able to tell?"

"Some people pay with a credit card…"

How do we know he did?!"

"Beats me. But it's worth a try…"

"Yeah, if you're insane."

"Um… I am, and so are you."

"Oh. Right." Alexa considered. "Okay, let's do it!"

"Oi," said Jack. "If I do not make it back to my _Pearl_ then consider yourselves dead."

"You don't have the _Pearl_ anyway," said Alexa. "Barbossa does."

Jack let out an exasperated sigh. "Oh shut it."

"Yeah anyways," said Keila, "Let's go home to disguise Jack first because he's a bit attention-drawing, then call the theater and persuade them to tell us everyone who bought tickets with a credit card for Pirates, and find every one of those people."

"You realize all the things that could go wrong with this plan?" said Alexa. "Some people cheat and see more than one movie once they get in, for one."

"You think too much!" said Keila. "Let's just go home first!"

They had to run home to avoid more paparazzi. Jack was half-blinded by the camera flashes and he was rubbing his eyes when they went into Alexa's room.

"Mom and Dad aren't home yet," said Keila. "But we have to hurry."

They pillaged the entire house, starting with fake glasses for Jack, and finally made Jack look ordinary enough. But…

"He looks like Johnny Depp," said Alexa.

"Yeah. I wonder why," pondered Keila.

"It can't be because Johnny Depp plays him, can it?" said Alexa, genuinely curious.

"I don't know… good question."

Jack squinted at them. "Who's Johnny Depp?"

"Oh just this actor, you know, the 'you' on screen at that movie," said Alexa vaguely.

"Is he an impersonator?"

"Erm... not exactly," said Keila. "Let's call the movie theater. Lex, do you have the phone number?"

Alexa had been reading the 'Calendar' section of the LA Times in her room and she rifled through the papers until she found the listing of the movies that were playing in the local theater.

"Here," said Alexa, reading the number from the paper aloud.

Keila pulled her phone from her pocket and dialed. Jack watched her with interest but while Keila waited he asked, "You don't happen to have rum in here, do you?"

Alexa looked pointedly at Jack and said, "We're too young to drink so we don't have anything alchoholic."

"No rum?" he said, shocked. "Mus' be a living hell here. No wonder you brought me here."

Alexa ignored him and fixed her gaze on Keila, who was muttering impatiently under her breath.

"Stupid movie people...they have such bad business techniques; won't even pick up the stupid phone...ugh...pick up for gosh sakes AHHHHHH!!!!"

Both Alexa and Jack jumped a foot into the air.

At that moment a lady said quietly, "AMC Theaters, how may I help you?" into the phone, but Keila was too busy rambling to notice.

"God these people suck, they should really get better at this, not answering the phone, seriously I thought AMC was supposed to be so good..."

"Hello?" said the lady. "AMC Theaters, how may I help you?" she repeated.

"OH!" Keila nearly shouted, and at the theater the lady winced. "Yeah... um... well... anyway I'd like to know all the people who have bought tickets for Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End today." She put the phone on speaker. Alexa eagerly leaned in, while Jack sat grumbling grumpily about the fact that he would have to do without rum.

"I'm sorry, miss, that information is confidential. May I know the reason?"

"I'm conducting a survey to see whether or not Pirates is more popular than Spiderman."

"Why would you need the names?"

"_Just tell me!_" Keila threatened in her most menacing tone.

She was very lucky because the lady was new to work and scared of being fired for not serving customers well so she told Keila to hold and came back a few minutes later with everyone who'd paid with a credit card.

"Do you want me to read the whole list to you...?" whimpered the lady.

Keila softened her tone. "Aww, it's okay... YEAH I DO."

Alexa rolled her eyes. "No, you can email it," she said loudly through the speaker.

"May I have your email address?"

"Yeah, it's..." Keila glanced nervously at Jack before shrugging and saying, "I underscore am underscore jacksparrow's underscore rum underscore bottle at jacksparrowforums dot net."

Jack looked up in alarm. _I put my lips to _her _every day?!_

"Okay," said the lady.

"Thanks," said Alexa and Keila in unison and they hung up.

Alexa turned on the laptop she and Keila shared, and they immediately logged onto _iamjacksparrow'srumbottle_.

The email from AMC was already in the InBox.

"She's fast..." Alexa stared.

"Well yeah duh since I kinda threatened her..."

"Omigod there are so many names... how are we gonna get through them all?"

Jack got up off the chair he had been sitting on and plopped down between the two girls.

"What is this?" He stared in fascination at the screen.

"It's called the Internet, dummy."

Keila slapped Alexa. "Don't call him a dummy, dummy. He's from the 18th century; how is he suppposed to know what the Internet is?"

Alexa shrugged indifferently to the fact that Jack wasn't supposed to know what the Internet was, but upon realizing that Keila had called her a "dummy", she stood up and screeched at the top of her lungs, "WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME?!"

Keila raised her eyebrows and grinned smugly. "Nothin'," she said nonchalantly. "Now sit down, dummy, before you miss all of this."

Alexa calmed down and sat down, this time right on Jack's ring-covered hands.

Shrieking wildly, she jumped right back up.

"Ew, he just touched my butt!"

"EW, I did not need to know that. C'mon, can we get back to this?" Keila grimaced and began writing on a piece of paper.

Jack ignored her and asked Alexa, "Butt? What butt? I didn't touch a butt..."

"STOP that this instant." Keila glared at the two of them, took a deep breath, and continued. "Now, if you want to get this pen back, you have to help me. If you don't, well, I don't really care, but Jack's never gonna get back to the Caribbean, which isn't bad for me, but might be rather a dilemma for our Mr. Sparrow here. Get it? Okay good, so sit back down, grab a pen and start helping."

Alexa lowered her eyes and sat down obediently. Jack looked at the two of them, one scribbling furiously with a tint of fire still raging in her eyes, the other meekly jotting notes down, cheeks red with embarrassment and he sighed deeply.

"What am I going to do with these two maniacs...?"

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**A/N: Ok, that was a bit of a long chapter, but now that you've finished reading it, please REVIEW!**


	6. The Coke Issue

**A/N: I'm just going to say this now: this entire chapter was written by blackpearl.fantasy. There, I'm giving her all the credit. All I did was write this A/N. :) But next time I'll have a share in the writing of the chapter, 'kay? Good. :)**

**Sorry we didn't update for so long! It's been over a _week_! Or two... But here's the chapter (finally). I won't delay you any longer, except...**

**_Please read and review!!_ Thank you to those of you who _have_ reviewed!**

**Disclaimer: We love PotC, but unfortunately it doesn't belong to us. :(**

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"Wait," said Alexa. "Why are we copying down names?"

"Because—" said Keila. At that moment they heard the back door downstairs open. A glance at the Jack Sparrow clock on Alexa's wall told them it was six thirty.

"Shoot, Jack, be very quiet. Mom's home," said Alexa frantically. "With Stephen."

"He has a concert tonight for orchestra in the city concert hall," Keila suddenly remembered. "And she's going to watch it. "

"Wow, I don't bother remembering these things," said Alexa. "So I guess Stephen's had dinner."

"Girls, I ordered a pizza for you and it's in the kitchen," called their mother up the stairs.

"Okay," replied Keila. "So you're leaving? And Dad's going to the concert too?"

"Dad's going, yes."

"And you're leaving?"

"I'm dropping Stephen off at school and then going to the concert hall. Did you do your homework?"

"Um…" said Alexa hastily, suddenly remembering homework that she'd been grumpy about because it was a Friday, and that they had gone to the movies without permission."It's almost done."

"All right, well, finish it, then."

"Okay, have fun."

"We'll be back by nine thirty."

" 'Kay, bye."

"Remember to take out the garbage."

" 'Kay, bye."

"And don't go out otherwise."

" 'Kay, bye."

"And—"

"Bye!"

They heard their mother sigh. "Bye, then."

"Bye!" the girls shouted.

As soon as they heard the door close Keila ran downstairs and grabbed the pizza box, some napkins, a bottle of Coke and some cups, and ran back upstairs.

"Okay, let's eat while we do this."

"As I was saying, why are we copying down names?" said Alexa.

"I dunno," said Keila.

Alexa sighed, opened the pizza box, and helped herself to a nice cheesy slice.

Jack stared.

"What _is_ that?"

"It's called pizza," explained Alexa, "and it's supposedly Italian. And it's good. Have some, I think you must be hungry."

He inched away from the box that Alexa gestured to and instead said hopefully, "What's in the bottle?"

"_Not _rum," said Keila.

Jack's face fell.

"But I think you'll like it," she added quickly, pouring a cup of it for Jack. "It's Coke. Like… okay, I guess no one really knows what it's made of, but it was invented on accident apparently. And it's very… carbonated. And strong. You can use it to remove bloodstains. And clean toilets."

"And get someone really hyper, a _bit_ like rum," added Alexa. "You should have seen the effect on Keila last time she drank too much. It was worse than how excited she and I were this afternoon, combined."

Jack shuddered, then after a moment asked, "What's a toilet?"

Alexa and Keila exchanged a look.

"You'll find out," said Keila at last, giggling at the thought of trying to explain.

"We'll tell you when you need to use it," said Alexa.

Jack raised his eyebrows but let it go. For the first time he actually had the time to look around this strange new world he'd come into. Everything was peculiar and he could see nothing that he recognized.

"Where did you get these _clothes_?" he asked first, plucking at the T-shirt that the girls had forced him to where, and the baggy shorts.

Alexa looked at Jack and couldn't help laughing (yet again) at the sight of him wearing modern clothes.

"Don't get Keila started on shopping, she'll go on for hours," said Alexa. "_I'll_ explain it. Your clothes are our brother Stephen's. I got my shirt on sale at Hollister, my jeans from Old Navy, Keila got her shirt from Aéropostale (it's lovely because _I_ picked it out for her), her shorts are the ones we have to buy for PE at school… and these are our school sweatshirts. They were _expensive_ because our school's pathetic and needs the money… We both got our running shoes from Sports Chalet, I have absolutely no idea where we bought the socks and oh! Did you see those _adorable _flats outside the door when we came in? Those are ours too and we got them in Beverly Hills. They're probably the most outrageously-high-priced shoes we ever bought but they are _so_ gorgeous!"

Jack stared at her blankly, not understanding a word, let alone know what kind of shoes flats were.

"Er… could you repeat that?" he asked.

Alexa grinned. "Sorry," she said apologetically. "Sometimes I forget you're not… um… modern, yeah. But don't worry. Keila would have given you an hour-long speech and start rambling about how much she _LOVES_ shopping."

Keila smacked Alexa's arm.

"We bought them at the mall," said Keila. "There, that's concise.

"Do you mean…" said Jack. "You _paid_ for them?"

"Of course," replied Alexa. "Haven't you ever done that before?"

Jack considered it for a moment.

"Nay, don't think I have."

"Anyway," continued Alexa, "I don't think we really need to be writing down all these names…"

Keila bit into her pizza. "Of course we do. We are going to search for their phone numbers or preferably addresses and copy those down too."

"We can't just call when we see the number wherever we find it, which is nearly impossible?"

"We're not using the home phone or our cell phones, it'll show up on the list when the phone bill comes! We're going to a pay phone somewhere."

"A _pay phone_?!" shrieked Alexa. "I want to finish this without going broke! Look at the length of this list! And I only _have_ about twenty dollars!"

While Alexa was ranting Jack looked at the dark bubbly liquid in his cup. He hadn't touched it yet. While the girls weren't looking Jack secretly pulled out his compass for good luck and rubbed it against his cheek. He smiled brightly, satisfied, and drained the cup of Coke.

He reached for the bottle for another cup.

And another. And another. And another.

"Oi," said Jack. "Is there any more of this? Seems to be gone."

"Jack!" exclaimed Keila. "Did you drink all the Coke?"

"Aye."

"Whoa, I think he's addicted to it!"

"Is there any more?" asked Jack.

"We have about a thousand cans downstairs," said Alexa. "D'you… want me to bring some up?"

" 'Course," said Jack, and paused. "I don't have to pay, do I?"

"No… and I don't expect you will, anyway."

Alexa came back upstairs quickly with a few cans of Coke and set them down before Jack.

"Wait, lass," he said. "This isn't… flammable, is it?"

"We're not going to burn it!"

"Good."

"Lex, help me search for people's phone numbers," said Keila.

"Just Google them," answered Alexa. "You can do it and I'll talk with Jack."

"Ex_cuse_ me?" demanded Keila.

"Okay, okay!"

While Jack started repeatedly stabbing the cans with his dagger because the twins had neglected to show him how to open it, Alexa and Keila sat before the computer desperately searching for names and phone numbers. Naturally nothing turned up and they looked in the phone book.

"Here we are," said Alexa after about an hour. Jack had finished all the cans of Coke and was examining Alexa's iPod with interest. "We've got most of the numbers. I'm impressed."

"You turn it on like this—" Keila reached over the turned on the iPod, stuck the earbuds in Jack's ears, and went to Alexa's albums. There were too many in there and she didn't want to scroll down, so she went to the Top 25 Most Played Songs and chose the first on the list.

"Like it?" she asked. Jack looked utterly confused, not knowing why there were sounds in his ears. He glanced at the screen. _How strange_, he thought. It read, _The Black Pearl. Klaus Badelt. Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl. _He glanced up at the poster of _Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest._

Evidently he and his _Pearl_, that stupid daft whelp, and darling Lizzie were very popular in… wherever he was.

"Don't you recognize it at all?" asked Alexa, who had come over.

"It's sounds familiar."

Alexa giggled. "You'll recognize this." She moved her finger down the touch-wheel and pressed the center button.

"It's _Hoist the Colours_," said Jack, surprised. "The Brethren Court is calling a meeting! Get. Me. Back."

"No, it's not!" said Alexa. "It's over. The story's over. Well, not for you, but for the pirates, at least for now. _At World's End _is in theaters already, that's why we have the soundtrack. This is just the music."

"The song isn't sung unless there is a meeting and I hear the song being sung so therefore there must be a meeting! Sav—" but Keila stuffed a lollipop into Jack's mouth.

"Yes, your reasoning skills are great," said Keila soothingly, "but this is just the song, recorded when it was actually sung."

Jack sat there mutely, stubbornly, convinced that the Brethren Court was gathering again but sucking on the lollipop happily.

"Oh, you'll like and know this one," said Alexa impatiently, stroking the touch-wheel again.

Jack immediately stood up and started dancing with an empty can of Coke.

"We're devils and black sheep and really bad eggs!" he sang out-of-tune-ly in the middle of the song, "Drink up me hearties yo ho! Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me!"

And he fell down on Alexa's bed.

"O… kay…" said Keila. "Yeah, I think he liked that! But let's go to the grocery store. It's only a block away and there's a pay phone outside. We have to hurry or they'll get back from the concert."

Alexa led the way downstairs, gathered a bag of quarters, and took Keila and Jack outside. They walked quickly to the grocery store—luckily there were no paparazzi this time even though Jack looked like Johnny Depp.

They found the pay phone and looked at the first person on the list—Sarah Aver.

Alexa dropped some money into the pay phone and waited. On the third ring someone answered.

"Hi, can I talk to Sarah Aver please?" said Alexa.

"Sure, this is Sarah," said Sarah.

"Hi, I've been informed that you bought tickets to see At World's End today."

"Who is this?" said Sarah suspiciously.

"Oh I'm a girl looking for a pen."

"Er… what does that have to do with anything?"

"Well… did you watch the movie in the afternoon?"

"Yes…"

"I need to know where you sat."

"In the back row. Why am I even telling you?"

"Did you sit on the very right side?" asked Alexa excitedly.

"Find something better to do with your time!" shouted Sarah into the phone. "Are you stalking me? Stupid kid, get a life!" She hung up.

Alexa put the receiver down, sighing exasperatedly.

"It didn't work, did it?" said Keila.

"OKAY SO WE'VE ESTABLISHED THAT I HAVE NO LIFE, GOSH!"

Keila backed away slowly until Alexa calmed down.

"Hey, where's Jack?"

Alexa's eyes widened. "Oh. Oh no."

They looked around frantically and then their worst fears were confirmed—rolling out of the sliding doors of the grocery store was an empty Coke can.

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**A/N: So..can you review now? Thanks:)**


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